Dress Codes Don't Suck!

A certain high school on Staten Island in New York is having problems with their students falling out of the dress code. It has become a fad, if you will, to go against the dress code and be punished, rather than wear the school’s proposed attire. In a way, the students have made breaking the dress code their own fashion statement.

The school’s philosophy is that the students need to abide by the dress code, which allows no provocative or gang related clothing (including low pants on boys). In turn, this will make them more successful students. “Dress for Success” is their mantra.

While I love fashion (I have been a fashion designer for more than 25 years and have also had more than my share of arguments with my parents about the way I should dress) I have to side with the school on this one. It has been verified that students do better in school if they are dressed to learn, rather than dressed for the beach or a night club. When I home-schooled my children, I found they were far more distracted when I allowed them to wear their pajamas to “school” then when I had them dress appropriately for their day of lessons.

I realize high school students want to make a statement with their clothing. But the statement many of them are making is not conducive to study. Girls in particular are apparently not aware of the distraction to boys, their provocative attire creates (or…maybe they are). I know from experience that choosing something to wear every morning, from your large arsenal of latest trends takes far more time than narrowing the choices with a dress code.

While the Staten Island school does not yet require uniforms, I propose that uniforms might be a better solution than fighting the students every day. School uniforms solve multiple issues; selection time each morning, less identification of wealth class, fewer distractions to both the students and the teachers, fewer regrets when viewing high school photos with your children later in life, and higher test percentages overall. And, if the decision is made to wear uniforms, I do believe the teachers should adhere to the policy as well.

When all is said and done, the uniform rule will not solve the issue of success completely. It has also been substantiated in numerous studies that students are more successful in school if their parents are involved, whether in the PTA, Home and School Club, or volunteering in other ways. And, that may prove to be a more difficult issue than staying with a dress code.

Embracing What We Stand For

Why are Christians are so eager to vocalize what we’re against, instead of embracing what we stand for? We seem to be more than ready to protest something that is offensive to us, but not as ready to share what gives us peace. Perhaps those of us who spend so much time protesting, have forgotten what it is that should make Christians different; a peace and joy that is beyond explanation.

Christ developed relationships before introducing the Gospel to people; He didn’t just blast people with the enlightenment that they were living in sin. He wanted to know about them, about their lives, before He stepped in to bring them the truth.

Today’s Christians seem to get a certain amount of joy from judging and condemning. Recently I was watching a documentary about a particular group of evangelical Christians who were quietly demonstrating against same sex marriage in front of a popular California City Hall. When approached by a homosexual who clearly did not understand, one of the Christian protesters said politely, “We love you, but we hate what you’re doing.” I don’t think that was a loving comment at all. What the gentleman heard was, “You’re a sinner and we won’t tolerate you!” Like everyone else, he knew to ignore everything that was said before the word but.

I think Christians forget several important factors in voicing their distaste of sin. 1) Non-believers are not held to the same standards as believers. They still don’t know Jesus as their Savior so cannot possibly follow His laws through love and obedience. 2) In our effort to introduce people to the Gospel, we forget to reach out in love and grace. Just saying you love someone doesn’t necessarily make them feel loved. 3) We need to develop relationships with people. That was a key ingredient to Jesus’ ministry. How can we possibly introduce someone to Christ before we even know what their needs are, where they’ve been, or what they’re going through? 4) Our purpose is not to judge. That is God’s job alone. We are only here as Christ’s vessels, to love others and teach them about Christ’s sacrifice for them. We’re asked to judge only when we identify another believer is falling short. And then there are specific guidelines to follow to reconcile the believer to Christ.

Let’s start looking at ourselves before we open our mouths about others.  We are all sinners in God’s eyes, and one sin doesn’t outweigh another as far as He’s concerned. Whether it's a teaspoon of dirt or a cupful, it still makes a glass of water undrinkable.

I’m looking forward to a day when we can approach each other with unconditional love, the kind Jesus has for us, and show non-believers how wonderful it is to be a child of God. Aren’t we more apt to bring people to the Lord if they’re able to see in us a more desirable and fulfilled life than what they see in non-believers?